Tonight as I sit in the dark I am drawn to ponder how different people react to the tragedy that is their early life. Some respond to a childhood filled with incredible trial and horror with an indomitable spirit that makes them better as a result of it. They choose to control their history by controlling their present and controlling their future. These people recognize that the darkness of their youth, while being a part of their history will not define them. Consciously choosing to be more than a victim is exceedingly difficult yet exceptionally important to them. They stare into the face of their tragedy until it is forced to avert its eyes from them.
Then there are the others…
The others choose the easy way out- the cowardly way out. They choose to limp around for the rest of their life using the crutch of their past as a never ending excuse for their present. The whole world does, or should, revolve around their tragic experience. No one else’s pain is worse than theirs. No one else can understand their suffering and everyone else’s experience is irrelevant when compared to their own. Self pity is at their core. Lifelong tragedy is their goal.
People try to reach out to them but eventually all are driven away. Driven away by irrational paranoia and anger brought on by the demons they are unwilling to overpower. The demon stares into their face and they choose to avert their eyes. Darkness and self pity become their comfort zones. Their complete alienation becomes a self fulfilling prophesy.
As their race nears its end it is not a bright light that they face but an ever tightening spiral of darkness. Smaller and smaller the circle becomes until it all fades to complete and absolute darkness.